Tuesday, June 13, 2006

I really hate to dwell on unhappy things. People who know me will understand. But each time I look at the situation, I look at the unhappy things that are still there, I get lost. I get unstable. It's like reopening a wound that's sealed many times. Every time I go back to them, that was how it felt. I'm lucky because after awhile, after not looking at the pain for so long and busying myself with my work, I forgot about it. When I face it, everything comes back. How I got this wound, how it hurts time and again, how much I want to remove the scar.
Yea..I've been thinking that maybe I allowed all this to happen and it's my fault because I only sweep things under the rug. (i'm lazy =D) But what else can I do? I can't trash things out with them. So I chose to ignore them.

The scars remind me..that the past is real..

Tell me. Tell me when will all these stop? It will stop if you let it stop. ( I'll say, try it yourself. without swearing)
One thing that I thought was, I won't hate my parents but I hate what they do. However, I've come to the point that I don't care what they do, so long as they don't drag me in. I really tired and I think I'll just end here and see what happens when I get home. (call that a home?)

I wish I don't have to..

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